LeWar Declared on LeVar Burton UPDATED

By: Dennis Rayburn
02/24/2009

Greetings from your LeWar correspondent. I am reporting to you from the Twitter Universe, at an undisclosed location near the front lines, covering the great conflict that has captured the attention of the Twitter Nation. Namely the massive slugfest between Michael Ian Black and Star Trek: The Next Generation's LeVar Burton.

The story of this LeWar starts with actor Michael Ian Black discovering that someone was on Twitter, pretending to be him. According to a post on his website, he was concerned about said person posting inaccuracies about his life on the service, when that was his job. So, after an onslaught by his attorneys, he reclaimed his Twitter identity. Deciding after that was done to start Twittering himself, he states that he discovered it was good clean fun. Then he made the discovery that changed his Twittering life: LeVar Burton has over 30,000 people following his postings on Twitter (32,730 at the time this was written). Michael could not fathom that LeVar Burton has so many following his thoughts on the popular service, so he declared LeWar in an effort to catch up to and pass LeVar.

Michael Ian Black shocked many when he offered LeVar's fellow Next Generation actor Wil Wheaton second in command of his forces. Wil responded to the offer,"@michaelianblack Oh no way, man!  I'm totally neutral in this.  You can't make me pick LeVar and LeVon.  No way no how not gonna do it."

LeVar Burton responded to the declaration of war by saying on the service: “@MichaelIanBlack has declared a Twitter war on me. It may be necessary to go Kunta on his ass.” Michael responded that he was impressed as he apparently didn't know that LeVar was Kunta Kinte in the miniseries, “Roots” (if you've never seen it, get the DVD as it is totally awesome television!).

Since then the forces of Burton and Black have been answering the rally call of their respective leaders and taking up their keyboards and cellphones to join the struggle. As of when this was written, Michael Ian Black has 3,088 followers but vows the war will be won. When contacted by me for a statement on the war, General Black responded, “@Drayburn LeWar is a Battle to the Death between LeVar Burton, star of screens large and small, and Michael Ian Black, at best, a C-Lister.”

I also contacted Fleet Admiral (Hey, it's about time Geordi was promoted!) LeVar Burton for his comments on LeWar. He told me, “@Drayburn I didn't start this fight, @michaelianblack did! I've seen it before of course: black on black crime. It's really quite shame.”

Forget the boxing heavyweight title fight, UFC, and Wrestlemania. We have right here a war of titans which will be the battle of the Twitter century. Will Michael Ian Black be “David” to LeVar's “Goliath” or will LeVar crush his opponent? Watch my Monday column next week as we will have an update on the enlistments to see what happens in this war of the Twitter Titans.

Till then, in the words of Michael Buffer, “Let's get ready to RUMBLE!!!”

Photos:  cpb.org, michaelianblack.net
Illustration by Sue-Lynn Beckwith of Roddenberry Productions

Author: Dennis Rayburn

Dennis Rayburn is a columnist for Roddenberry.com. His column, "Two Strips of Latinum" appears every Sunday through Thursday.
Contact: drayburn@roddenberry.com
Twitter: http://twitter.com/drayburn

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